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11 Ways To Develop A More Inclusive Communication Style At Work

Forbes Coaches Council
POST WRITTEN BY
Forbes Coaches Council

If it seems like the fight for female equality in the workplace has stalled out, it's probably because it has. While women make up more than 50% of the workforce, they only make up 14.6% of executive officers, according to a report from Center for American Progress.

Despite remarkable gains, discrimination at work often occurs unconsciously — and it's reinforced by both men and women in everyday conversation. How can leaders ensure they're part of the solution? To find out, we asked members of Forbes Coaches Council to explain how leaders can adjust their communication style in order to be more inclusive.

Clockwise from top left: Joseph Ranseth, Kim Eisenberg, Yosh Beire, Emily Kapit, Julie Kantor, Jen Kelchner, Brett Baughman, Jessica Miller-Merrel, Corry Boyas, Terra Bohlmann, Elle Ingalls. All photos courtesy of the individual members.

1. Don't Be Afraid Of Authenticity, Vulnerability Or Affection

In a "let's get down to business" work culture, we can focus too much on the task at hand instead of the person performing that task. All humans have a drive for connection, but women are generally better at bringing that to work than men. Remember that all work being done is connected to a person doing that work. People always perform better when they feel heard and appreciated. In our office, we hug.   – Joseph RansethJosephRanseth.com

2. Begin By Recognizing Your Unconscious Biases

Gender gaps in the workplace are not overcome by good intentions. Each of us must acknowledge our unconscious gender biases, and look at the ways those biases influence our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. No one is immune. Further, we need to collectively step past the antiquated notion of gender binary and move toward inclusion of a broad range of genders and identities.   – Kim EisenbergKim Eisenberg Consulting

3. Adjust Your Listening And Speaking Style

For starters: Speak in less definitive terms. End your statements with questions that express the possibility that there is more to uncover. Women often bracket their statements with "this may be a crazy idea but... ." Or, "you probably thought of this already but... ." Affirm their contribution. Explicitly acknowledge the core idea. Don't just listen for facts. Listen for values and feelings. Paraphrase.   – Yosh BeierCollaborative Coaching LLC

4. Recognize And Allow For Different Communication Styles

I actually think this principle applies to leaders of all types (regardless of gender), but the simple act of male leaders recognizing a difference in communication styles for women is a significant start. The real game-changer, though, is when leaders actively welcome unique communication styles and maintain an open, accessible culture that champions diversity among how people interact.   – Emily Kapit, MS, MRW, ACRW, CPRWReFresh Your Step, LLC

5. Stop Talking, Solicit Engagement And Genuinely Listen

When at work, men talk freely. They do not wait to be asked to speak. In contrast, women tend to wait until someone asks for their input, as they value connections. Hence, male leaders should stop talking so much and spend effort reaching out to women, asking their opinions, ideas, etc. The net result will be more diverse, fruitful and productive communications.   – Julie Kantor, PhDJP Kantor Consulting

6. Remove Your Preconceptions And Be Open

Most of us carry preconceived notions and stereotypical responses in our heads to assign to people we interact with daily. Remove these limiting beliefs and be open to the person in front of you. Win the conversation by listening and genuinely connecting in response to what you've heard. Acknowledge the strengths of your counterpart and create a relationship that leads to mutual success.   – Jen KelchnerKelchner Advisory

7. Focus On Results

Whether you're male or female, the simplest way to lead a successful team and ensure that you are treating everyone equally is to focus on the results. As the leader of a group of individuals, you job is twofold: the first is to make sure you accomplish your goal; the second is to inspire your team. Understand what drives each person and help them thrive. Male or female, the goal is the same: success.   – Brett BaughmanThe Brett Baughman Companies, Inc.

8. Focus On Building Relationships And Trust Within Your Team

Male leaders must focus on building relationships with all members of their team, allowing for honest conversations. Additionally, male leaders need to be aware that often women don't interrupt or interject because of confidence or to avoid conflict. Creating a team built on inclusiveness and trust goes a long way for all employees, not just women.   –Jessica Miller-MerrellBlogging4Jobs

9. Be Adaptable

Of course there are always exceptions to the rule, but generally speaking, women and men are motivated by different factors and interpret things differently. Males tend to just jump into a task and figure it out as they go along, while females tend to ask questions and make certain they fully understand the goal before tackling it. Being able to adapt to a colleague's needs will ensure less rework and greater success.   – Cory BoyasCory Boyas

10. Why Not Ask The Women You Lead?

Simply said, male leaders should feel comfortable asking women about their preferred communication style. It's not so much a male vs. female thing because everyone has a preferred communication style. When a male leader asks a woman "How do you prefer to communicate?", it instantly breaks down any defense because it gives women a choice. At the end of the day, everyone wants to be heard, right?   – Terra BohlmannBrightBound

11. Are You Listening Or Are You Rehearsing?

A common complaint women have is that they feel male colleagues do not really hear what they are saying. If you find yourself rehearsing in your mind what you want to say next instead of really listening to the person you are talking with, change it up. Stop your thoughts and focus on what the speaker is communicating with their words and body language. Your full attention will be noticed.   – Elle IngallsPressure-Free Living LL