In the work-life balance conversation for entrepreneurs, there are two camps; those who acknowledge the need for work-life balance and those who see work-life balance as a hindrance to one's career. Each side hits on truth from a different perspective.
Jeff Berger (27) is the CEO of Doostang (disclosure: Jeff is a Member of Empact Sphere), the leading employer network for young professionals. He falls into the latter camp, “My theory is that as you make work-life balance more of a priority, your career will plateau more and more. I believe that those who work longer and harder will rise to the top.” This sentiment complements opinions expressed in articles like the widely read “The 'Real Winners Of The World' Don't Have Work-Life Balance, They Have Work.”
On the other extreme, people can burnout, permanently damage their body, and lose their most important relationships by ignoring work-life balance for too long. In 1996, Benjamin Quinto, in his early twenties, started a project that evolved into the Global Youth Action Network. He built it up to a staff of 29 people who were creating a large, global impact on the world. In his late twenties, he got burned out to the point where he felt like he was losing his mind. He left the business temporarily and even went to a mental health clinic. When I asked him what he learned from the experience, he said, “Pay attention to the early signals. When you think you might be burning out, you probably are.”
Starting a New Conversation on Work-Life Balance
The debate over work-life balance is often framed as the number of hours one works. However, according to new research from Dr. Bryan Robinson, author of Chained to the Desk, a psychotherapist, and a Professor at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte., this isn't the real issue.
The real issue is addiction.
Work addiction (a.k.a workaholism) isn’t defined by the number of hours you work. It’s defined by your relationship with the work. When you work based on fear, you create adrenaline from the fight or flight response. While adrenaline boosts performance in the short-term, it can be addictive and have long-term consequences if overused. Dr. Robinson shares, “People can go through the same events and experience them differently. Overworking is not caused by the workplace any more than alcoholism is caused by the liquor store."
“The issue is that working reduces the stress of workaholics. That underlying anxiety comes from somewhere else. For many, it comes from families where there were a lot of ups and downs. Work addicts feel like work gives them control over an unruly situation. It is like a medication. The problem is that the medication is temporary, and it creates secondary problems.”
The stats on the impact of long-term work addiction are scary. Robinson’s own research in the American Journal of Family Therapy shows that workaholics are 40% more likely to have marriages that end in divorce. Children from workaholic homes have very similar profiles to those with alcoholic parents. They have more stress, greater depression, and are more likely to have an external locus of control, which means that they believe that they are controlled by external events rather than vice-versa. Other studies show that, “Over the long-run, work addiction weakens the immune system, leads to heart problems, and even Type II diabetes.”
Dr. Gayle Porter, Professor at the Rutgers School of Business and one of the country’s leading work-life balance researchers, adds, "Technology is the probably largest enabler of work addiction."
Work addiction is the only addiction that society supports. So how do we know if we're actually addicted to our work so we can begin to change our relationship to work?
6 Questions to Ask Yourself to See If You’re Addicted to Work
How do you know whether you're a hard worker or a work addict?
Based on my interviews with Dr. Porter and Dr. Robinson, I combined 6 questions you can ask yourself to gain more clarity:
Are the people closest to you telling you that you have a problem (i.e., your closest friends and family think you work way too much)?
Do you have chronic health issues (i.e., headache, upset stomach, fatigue, indigestion, chest pain, shortness of breath, nervous tics, dizziness) that are a result of stress from overwork, but are still unable to make a change?
Do you have chronic behavioral issues (i.e., temper outbursts, restlessness, insomnia, difficulty relaxing, irritability, impatience, forgetfulness, difficulty concentrating, boredom and mood swings from euphoria to depression) that are a result of stress from overwork, but are still unable to make a change?
Are you lying about whether or not you’re working to keep those around you happy (i.e., working in the bathroom over vacation while your spouse is asleep)?
Is your identity so wrapped up in your work that if you lost it, you wouldn’t be able to bounce back?
Is the only way you feel good about life by working hard?
To see if you’re a workaholic, you can take the full test on Dr. Robinson’s website.
How Not To Be A Workaholic
At the end of the day, we have to ask ourselves whether we’re working to live or living to work. As Dr. Porter shares, “Getting satisfaction from work is a great thing, but there is a line that can be crossed where it’s the only thing. When that line is crossed, it becomes harder to cope and bounce back.”
Ramit Sethi learned this lesson of not building one's whole identity around his company.
After graduating from Stanford, he started a blog called I Will Teach You To Be Rich and co-founded the popular venture-backed, team collaboration platform, PBworks. In the middle of PBwork's growth curve, Ramit made a very difficult decision. He left the company and the tech world to write a book and follow his passion for helping others lead all-around richer lives. His book, I Will Teach You To Be Rich, became a New York Times Bestseller.
Ramit admits that when he originally left the Valley for New York City, he was nervous about losing recognition. Now, a few years later, he isn’t bothered one bit. “The recognition in Silicon Valley was nice, but I want to make sure I'm not just working for an ego reward, but making an actual difference in the business and helping other people lead a richer life. I don’t want to build my identity around the wrong things, so I’m careful about how I define myself now.”
Ramit went on to give the following advice, “You want to be cognizant of building an identity that authentically reflects who you really are. You don’t find it like you find a piece of treasure under a rock. It is a process, and it continually changes. It is a matter of accepting and optimizing where you really are.”
Michael Simmons is the co-founder of Empact, a global entrepreneurship education organization that has held 500+ entrepreneurship events including Summits at the White House, US Chamber of Commerce, and United Nations. Connect with him on Twitter (@michaeldsimmons) and his Blog.
