I just turned 61.
If you had told me, when I was 30, or 40, that at 60+ I'd feel healthier, stronger, more content, more attractive, and more confident than at any previous point in my life - I would simply not have believed you.
But with every day that passes, my own life and those of my friends and colleagues throw my pre-existing negative notions about aging into question. As a culture in the US, we are youth-obsessed. Most advertising, as well as the plot lines of most movies and TV shows, propose that our lives peak between 30 and 40 - i.e., that we are at our most desirable, powerful, happy and effective at that period - and that it's a slow downhill slide from that point onwards.
But it turns out that my experience is not unique...a number of studies done over the past few years show that our golden years can be our happiest and most productive. A Gallup poll conducted in 2008 with over 340,000 people showed that adults in their 70s and 80s are significantly happier and more satisfied with their lives than younger adults by almost every measure. And people over 50 are more likely to achieve mastery in a field of endeavor than we might suspect, as well. Some studies debunk our assumptions that creativity and intellectual achievement decline in later life - and the anecdotal evidence of people who achieve great things even after their hair starts to turn grey is all around us. Warren Buffett, for instance, seems to be doing pretty well mentally at age 82.
And some older people start entirely new endeavors in midlife - and go on to become world-class experts. I wrote a post on mastery a few days ago, and included a video of a man named Ray Bethell, the world's champion multiple kite flier. Ray started flying kites at 56 and is now 86.
As I've been reflecting on my own life and talking with others in their 50s, 60s and 70s, I've been trying to understand what makes later life great for some people - and a burden for others. I've come to believe (and research supports me) that optimism is the single most important factor in positive and happy aging. And the wonderful news is - it's within our control.
In other words, managing how you talk to yourself about getting older and what it implies is the best way to help insure a happy and productive life after 50.
And this is something you can practice moment-to-moment. Next time you find yourself thinking "I'm too old for that," or "People my age don't..." or "I guess it's too late for me to..." Stop. Take a breath, and disagree with yourself. Think, instead, "There's no reason I can't..." or "I'm excited about doing..."
If you need some inspiration, here's 108-year-old holocaust survivor and concert pianist Alice Herz-Sommer, on optismim as the secret of her success:
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