Fear of the unknown is a fundamental part of human nature; a vestige of our primitive past where playing it safe was a matter of life and death. While our society has evolved this deeply embedded fear has remained part of the human experience.
For most of us, uncertainty in life is a constant source of anxiety, stress, and frustration. I used to think that systemic and pervasive uncertainty was unique to entrepreneurs, but now I realize that it is a challenge that faces anyone looking to play an active role in shaping the world.
Those of us who refuse to be passive players in life must contend with the stress of living with pervasive uncertainty. My family and I have dealt with it for years now, ever since I started BodeTree. It has been nearly six years of not knowing what city we’ll put down roots in. Six years of living on a roller coaster of emotional highs and lows.
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On the surface, this may seem like a net negative experience. It’s true that this sort of uncertainty often cripples people, sending them scurrying back to the safety of a less dynamic lifestyle. However, I’ve found that a life of uncertainty can make individuals and families stronger. As with most things in life, the more challenging path can lead to personal and professional growth.
Polishing off the rough edges
Throughout my life, certain phrases and insights have stuck with me while other lessons have faded. One such lesson came from a history teacher whose class I attended during my junior year of high school. I cannot remember the complete context of the conversation, but I will never forget the lesson she shared.
She spoke about how our personalities are like rough-hewn rocks, full of sharp edges and imperfections, which have been tossed into a river. Just as rocks are slowly polished and smoothed by the constant flow of the river, our personalities are polished and refined by the constant flow of challenges and uncertainty that we contend with.
Confronting the worst aspects of your personality
That image has always stuck with me and helped me to recognize the underlying value of the challenges I face. Uncertainty tends to bring out the worst parts of your personality. On a personal level, I know that my type-A tendencies and anxiety often get the best of me.
The uncertainty of the entrepreneurial life has pushed these flaws out into the open and forced me to confront them head-on. This internal confrontation and introspection have helped me grow as a father, husband, and leader on some levels.
I know that I’ve become more compassionate, self-aware, and open with those around me. I have no doubt that this accelerated path to enlightenment, so to speak, was a direct result of having to face the challenges of our uncertain place in the world. Had I taken a more comfortable path, I know that I wouldn’t have been forced to contend with these aspects of my personality as directly, and would have let them fester under the surface for years.
Living in the moment
Perhaps the most valuable side effect of dealing with uncertainty is the ability to live in the moment. Throughout my life, I’ve always been looking ahead to what is next at the expense of the present. Looking back, I think that I’ve missed out on opportunities, both personally and professionally due to my constant focus on the future.
A good example of this happened last year when I was evaluating a deep strategic partnership with a much larger company. I was so focused on trying to maximize value based on what could be that I lost sight of what we needed to do in the moment. The uncertainty of the situation took its toll on me, and ultimately nothing came of the arrangement. I realize now that had I simply focused on the moment I was in, the outcome could have been much different.
Uncertainty is part of life for those of us who are never satisfied. If you’re looking to make your mark on the world, you will have to learn to deal with the anxiety and stress of staring into the void of the unknown. The fear that you’ll undoubtedly experience doesn’t have to cripple you. Instead, remember the parable of the rock tossed into the river. The forces that push against you work to make you a smoother, stronger, and more well-rounded person.
