Dear Liz,
I'm just out of school with my MBA and interviewing for jobs in the New York metro area. We had some major health issues with my dad during my last semester of school, so I wasn't able to take advantage of our career services offerings before I graduated. Now I am out on the job market and really surprised by some of what I see.
Is it conventional for interviewers to ask a job-seeker "What other firms are you interviewing with?" I get this question at nearly every job interview. Why is it anyone's business which other firms I'm talking to? They certainly aren't going to tell me about the other candidates they're interviewing.
How do I answer this question without seeming rude but without giving away too much information?
Thanks,
Megan
Hi Megan,
Congratulations on your MBA, and on your wholly appropriate discomfort over the rudeness of some interviewers. There is a serious lack of boundaries in corporate and institutional life where job-seekers are concerned.
As you point out, your interviews with other firms are your business and no one else's. It is none of an interviewer's concern who else you're talking to about a job.
If you share that information, thinking that the blue-chip names you throw into the conversation might help an employer see your value, you can only lose.
I have seen this conversation replayed a million times:
INTERVIEWER: So, who else are you talking with -- which firms?
YOU: Goldman, Merrill, a hedge fund in New Jersey, very up-and-coming ---
INTERVIEWER: Who's that?
YOU: Dweebish and Skittles.
INTERVIEWR (unimpressed): Oh.
YOU: So, yeah, I'm in quite a few active conversations --
INTERVIEWER: We'll let you know if we're interested.
You cannot impress people by name-dropping. The Reactionometer rules the job-interview roost. If you truly impress, which is to say mildly threaten, the interviewer's delusion that they are mighty and you are lowly, you can only frighten them. Most people in bureaucratic jobs are mired in fear.
They will push away that fear however they can, minimizing your accomplishments (or in this case, your alternatives) in order to make themselves feel better.
Nothing you say in answer to the question "Which other firms are you talking to?" will make the interviewer rise up from the chair, go find a person with budget authority and make you an offer on the spot. They'll discount and diminish your alternatives, instead, rather than disrupt their own process and their cozy belief that whatever they do and say is not to be questioned.
Your best bet when the question "Which other firms are you interviewing with?" comes up is to keep your counsel. Handle it this way:
INTERVIEWER: So, which other firms are you interviewing with?
YOU: It's been terrific to get out of school and find that a number of great firms are interested in working with me. I can't share their names of course, but I'm happy to know that there's a need for folks like me in excellent companies like yours. Should we talk about salary, to make sure we're in the same ballpark?
You are not a sheep or a lemming. You are not a supplicant, grateful for crumbs. You have experience, brains, pluck, your sparkling personality and a new MBA, and everything you bring to the employer has value. The people who get you, deserve you, and the ones who don't are welcome to go jump in a lake or lead happy lives doing whatever pleases them. You don't have time for them. Don't tell anybody which firms you're interviewing with unless you're in a run-down situation and you want to get a reaction to a job offer you've received.
You'll do that over the phone or via email. Phone is best -- higher level of emotional energy!
RRRRRRING!
THEM: Neville Longbottom!
YOU: Hi Neville, this is Luna Lovegood. We've been talking about your Risk Management Analyst position. Do you have a second to chat?
NEVILLE: Yes, what's up, Luna?
YOU: I wanted to let you know that I received a job offer from another firm I've been talking with. I wanted to let you know, in case you were interested in extending an offer for me to look at as I make my decision about which firm to join.
NEVILLE: Who's the firm? What's the offer?
YOU: The firm is a hedge fund manager and the offer is for $115,000 with a 15 percent bonus opportunity.
NEVILLE: Let me get back to you.
YOU: Thanks Neville. I have about three business days to work this out.
NEVILLE: Okay.
It's business, Megan! Business is right in the name of your new degree. Treat your interviewing process like a business process, because that's what it is. Only the people who get you, deserve you. Don't share personal information with the people on the other side of the table until you're sitting on that side of the table with them, offer signed and hands shaken.
You learned about negotiation in B-school, I'm sure. The more inside information you give your negotiation partner, the less negotiating power you retain. You want your future employer to know what a cool negotiator you are, don't you? Keep your competing firms to yourself, smile and stay in your body. The right people will appreciate your discretion!
Best of luck to you,
