Susan is the director of the Michael G. Foster School of Business MBA Mentor Program at the University of Washington and author of the book, Mentoring Moments: Inspiring Stories from Eight Business Leaders and MBAs, and below she debunks some of the most common misconceptions about mentoring:
Myth 1: Mentors choose their mentees.
Susan Canfield: In the past, corporate mentoring programs were often designed primarily for high potential employees. This practice was turned upside down when the technology sector started rapidly growing and competing for talent. Mentoring programs were seen as a way to recruit, retain and train these coveted tech employees.
Along with the increase in corporate mentoring opportunities was the recognition that mentees are in the best position to choose their mentors because they often know what they want to learn and from whom they want to learn it. This more widely-accepted practice is supported by research on mentor matching, which shows mentees have more “skin in the game” when choosing their own mentors. In addition, mentors are no longer necessarily more senior; they can come from anywhere within the organization.
Myth 2: You only need one career mentor.
Canfield: The old mentoring model assumed you only needed one good mentor to guide you throughout your career. When people stayed with one company for many years this mentoring model was more effective. While one good mentor is certainly better than none, more frequent career moves has brought a new view of mentoring: We most benefit from a network of mentors with a rich mix of expertise and experience.
This network is dynamic and changes based on our learning needs at different stages of our careers. In interviewing senior executives about their mentoring experiences, there has been one consistent theme - they regretted not taking greater advantage of the many learning opportunities around them, whether in formal or informal mentoring situations.
Myth 3: You are either a mentor or a mentee – you either teach or you learn.
Canfield: Although not necessarily viewed this way, mentoring has always been a reciprocal arrangement in which both the mentor and mentee learn and benefit from the relationship. While mentee benefits may be more obvious, mentors gain as well. Mentors have the opportunity, indeed the privilege, of reflecting on pivotal career moments, testing their long-held assumptions, and participating in another person’s professional and personal growth.
There is an added bonus for those mentoring millennials -- learning about everything from uses of social media to the newest smartphone applications. Great mentoring relationships are built on trust, respect, and the desire and willingness of the mentor and mentee to open up and learn from each other.
Myth 4: Mentoring is a formal relationship with mentors driving the relationship.
Canfield: While mentors create structure based on their availability and what they want to offer, mentees are responsible for driving the relationship. They should not be shy about saying to the mentor, “This is why I chose you and this is what I hope to learn from you.”
The relationship is best served by mentors regularly asking for feedback (“Is this helpful to you?”) and mentees regularly asking for what they want (“I’m interested in hearing more about your biggest career challenges and how you overcame them.”).
Mentoring also occurs in less formal ways -- by observation alone. Senior executives in the Foster MBA Mentor Program frequently say that some of their most powerful mentoring moments came from simply observing great leaders. The word mentor was never used.
Lisa Quast: As an expert on mentoring, any final advice?
Canfield: We all have the opportunity to mentor and be mentored throughout our lives. Mentors learn as much as they teach. If we are actively engaged and are eager to learn, mentors are often available just for the asking. You can certainly be successful in your career without mentors, but they can bring a richness and perspective to your life beyond measure.
Well said!
