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Want to Get a Promotion? Be Funny

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Last year we had two final candidates for an admin job in our company; both looked great on paper, and their phone interviews had been positive.

We then had both candidates do an in-person "inbox simulation" - in effect, a couple of hours doing tasks and interactions he or she would do on the job. So both people came into the office and spent a couple of hours with us. It quickly became very clear which person we wanted.  A key difference: one candidate had a sense of humor, while the other was almost completely humorless.

It wasn't that our chosen candidate told jokes, or did a stand-up routine; she responded to our lightness with laughter, and said humorous things in response.  When I said, "You're a native New Yorker?"  I don't meet many of those," she replied, "Yeah, I know more people in New York who are from other countries than from other boroughs." Not knee-slapping - just witty and clever; it made me smile.

I read an excellent post here on Forbes today about humor in the workplace, Jacquelyn Smith's 10 Reasons Why Humor Is a Key To Success At Work. I agree with all of her "10 reasons" - most focus on the power of humor to build relationships and promote both efficiency and innovation.  And she also cites some interesting research about how senior management views the importance of having a sense of humor:

"A Robert Half International survey, for instance, found that 91% of executives believe a sense of humor is important for career advancement; while 84% feel that people with a good sense of humor do a better job."

So then - how do you get funnier at work?  And how do you make sure that your humor is office-appropriate and will be well-received? Some don'ts and dos:

Don't be funny at others' expense.  Humor that makes someone else look bad may get laughs in the moment...but people will leave the interaction wondering if you're saying the same sort of thing about them when they're not around. And if you're the boss and you make those kinds of comments (for instance, greeting a late-comer to a meeting by saying, "Glad you decided to make time for us in your busy schedule,") that person - and others - are likely to feel uncomfortable and resentful, even if they smile or laugh in response.  Overall, humor that includes a dig at someone feels disrespectful and erodes trust.

Don't use humor to reinforce stereotypes. I hope this one is really obvious: any humor that relies upon stereotypes about race, ethnicity, religion or gender won't be seen as funny by most people, and could get you in legal trouble besides. Just don't do it.

Don't rely primarily on 'jokes' for your humor. For the most part, someone whose workplace version of humor begins with "Did you hear the one about...?" isn't going to be seen as funny.  This approach to humor feels canned; like the laugh track on a bad sit-com. If you 'tell jokes' as a way of being funny, people may laugh (if the jokes are good ones), but they're not likely to connect with you in the same way as if you simply comment humorously on what's happening right then.

Which brings us to the Dos:

Do look for the humor in the moment. The single best way to be more humorous at work is to focus on what's funny about life in general and work in particular.  For instance, just this morning, I was addressing a group of 60 women with whom two colleagues and I will be working all week, and it took me a minute to get their attention; they were all introducing themselves to each other.  So I said, "You'll notice, as the week goes on, it will get harder and harder for me to get your attention when I get up to speak."  Most of them laughed at this - they know it's true; as they get to know one another over the course of the week, they'll be less and less inclined to stop their conversations when the person upfront starts talking. It broke the ice quickly, and let them know right away that we were going to have an informal, fun time together.

Do read the room.  There are times for humor, and times to be serious. Before trying to be funny, take a minute to really focus on how others are feeling. If people are a little worried or upset, humor might be the best thing to defuse the situation.  But if they're really sad, angry or shocked - humor will most likely fall flat.

Do be willing to be a little silly.  A bit of goofiness or a flight of fantasy can do wonders to lighten up a stuck meeting or an awkward moment. My business partner is a past master at this.  Last week, talking about an important meeting with a potential client about which we're all a bit concerned, he said, "I'll be managing that meeting. I've prepared a song."  It cracked us all up.

Do be self-deprecating - in moderation. One of my favorite executives is really great at this. He runs a major media company, and is an extremely smart, accomplished person. However, because he's willing to says funny, true-ish things about himself  like, "I get so enamored of my own ideas - here, let me shut myself up, so you can tell me what you think," even the most junior employees in his company feel comfortable greeting him in the halls and sharing their ideas in meetings.  Self-deprecating humor invites people into your space, signals openness and non-defensiveness.  (Of course, you then have to be open and non-defensive...)

Do respond to others' humor.  A big part of being funny is acknowledging other people's funniness.  That was one of the most disconcerting things about the candidate we didn't hire. When we tried to be funny, she just stared back at us, straight-faced.  When you get no response to an attempt at humor, it's embarrassing and uncomfortable. Exchanging light-hearted comments, responding to others' wit and humorous insights, is one of the best foundations for easy, smooth working relationships. It immediately makes people feel 'gotten' - understood and accepted - on an almost subliminal level.

Humor also simply makes everything easier.  It can give you perspective on difficult times and inpsire you to keep going.  In the words of Henry Ward Beecher:

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road.

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Check out Erika Andersen’s latest book, Leading So People Will Followand discover how to be a followable leader. Booklist called it “a book to read more than once and to consult many times.”

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